Down South Camp Meeting

This week's post follows a time-honoured tradition: what we did on our summerspring holidays. Although actually it's more like "what she did on her spring holidays, and what he did while she was away on her spring holidays, because he didn't go away".

He Goes:

It's tempting, if you live in London (or on its outskirts, as I do) to forget that there are places outside the city where you can also go dancing. After all, if there are so many socials and classes on that your question is not "is there dancing tonight?" but "which one do I go to?" (and that is certainly the case), there's no real need to look any further.

But there are classes outside London, and socials. From where I am, in the suburbs, it's just as easy to get to Windsor or Reading as it is to get to central London. Since I have a friend in Reading who regularly comes into London to meet up at socials, I returned the favour this weekend and went out to Reading Swing Jam 7.

When you mainly dance in the same places you tend to get used to who to dance with and when. You get used to the idea that W is a brilliant follow but she always has to go early, so you get your dances in as soon as possible after class, that X will stay to the end, that Y will come and ask you for a dance if she's free, but Z will have to be asked. You can get a grip on how to fill your time, and for me personally the only time I'll be sat out is if the night is lead heavy and all the follows are on the floor (which might be a little irksome, but only a proper curmudgeon could be upset about other people having fun - especially the poor follows who have to sit out so many dances under normal circumstances).

Going to somewhere new is like being a beginner dancer again. You have no idea who's going to be good or who you're going to be good enough for - or rather, whose style is going to click with yours and vice versa - and the vexing question of technique means that you can't necessarily even rely on your follow being able to do moves in the same way you're used to. I was incredibly shy when I first started swing dancing - I think it took me two weeks to get from going dancing to asking one person to dance during the night. When I go to a social where I know hardly anyone I feel a little of that coming back. Of course, the general rule of politeness is that you don't turn down dances without a good reason, so once I'm a few dances in I'm usually back on the horse, but the start can be a little shaky.

So worth it, though! There are good times to be had dancing with new follows, clever breaks to be learnt, the joy of showing off a signature move and having your partner experience it for the first time (apologies to my regular follows for all the things that I think are so cool but which you probably have to see from me every week). There are also a few experiences at a pure social that you can't get under normal circumstances - for instance, there were a few people at the social on Saturday who'd never done partnered swing-dancing before (they'd come a long from a solo Charleston workshop early on that afternoon), so I taught three people how to dance while dancing with them - a surprisingly rewarding feeling.

It wasn't a particularly busy event by any means (unusually quiet, my friend tells me), but that was okay. There was enough floorspace for all the couples on the dance floor to be able to swing out, enough people for a decent showing when a Shim-Sham started, and in general a good night. I doubt that anyone reading this needs reminding, but: go to new places sometimes, and dance with new people. You'll (usually) have a blast.

£170 Fri-Mon all inclusive? Seems pretty reasonable...

She Goes:

I just got back from Hep Cats Holiday. Phew, I'm knackered!

It was my first dance holiday, and I booked it mainly to celebrate my first swingiversary and get my social dance on, rather than expand my knowledge.

In hindsight I should have paid more attention to the music line up, as well as the background of the organisation putting the event on, as it was far more rock and rolling than I was originally expecting ( I thought it would be an even mix rather than heavily weighted towards R'n'R). I'm not saying it was a bad thing, just that next time I'm going to think a little more before I decide to go somewhere! It was fun and interesting to immerse myself in a different facet of the vintage dance scene, even if it's not where I'm at personally.

Keith makes a valid point about these sort of events making you feel like a beginner again, when you rock up and know next to nobody. Sadly one of our group had to drop out due to illness, so we were a modest party of 3. Most groups were easily double that, and on the first night there seemed to be very little interaction between the pockets of people. Maybe it's the scene or the age group the music attracts (and I mean that last part in the nicest possible way) but couples tended to stick to themselves and their cliques, and unless you were a known face it was a little unnerving asking for dances (as I sure wasn't getting asked for many!!)

I was so homesick for my regular dance friends I can't even begin to tell you. And I'm a big fan of throwing myself in at the deep end socially, rocking up solo and diving right in... but I missed the familiar faces. It was a weekend long party- it felt strange to not be sharing it with the people I know and love. (I did write about it elsewhere if you want more in-depth half-baked half-caffeinated meanderings)

Doing classes helped to break the ice a bit, and a friend from a different group reintroduced me to a few people I've danced with occassionally, which helped me to ease into it. I hadn't thought I'd feel that way though... I'll be prepared for it next time!

It's undeniable the benefits of dancing with complete strangers though, as Keith has already mentioned, so I won't labour the point on that front. I'm very pleased to say that I danced with 3 of the teachers from the weekend. It took me a little while to work up the nerve (and to drink a couple of rums) but I'm so pleased I did. I tend to feel a bit weary in approaching teachers that I'm not already friends with because I don't want to crowd them. One part of my job is making small talk with complete strangers all day, which is why sometimes in the evening I'm quiet with people I don't know- because I want a break! I imagine dance teachers feel somewhat similar. But then, if they're out socially then surely they are in the mood for a dance? ...I think the thing is to approach in a relaxed manner, after all, everyone will be wanting to ask them! Avoid asking after a particularly fast dance, and ask with a smile, and leave with a smile if someone a) beats you to it or b) they turn you down. And if you do score a dance, chill out! You're not auditioning to be their new dance partner!! AND! Do. Not. Ask. For. Feedback. Unless. It. Is. Offered. The social dancefloor is not the time or the place for such things.

So to sum up; I had a smashing time. I stayed out late and missed lessons because I favoured partying and napping over learning! I danced with lots of old dudes, wore dresses with skirts that flashed my swing pants at every turn (perhaps why I was so popular with the aforementioned gentlemen), learnt to pace myself (well, kind of, in terms of dancing 7 hours a night 3 nights in a row), and break through being psyched out by not knowing anyone.

Things I will remember for next time; get feedback from peers before booking somewhere and break through the fear barrier.

Spoon, over and out.